i solve my problems by blatantly ignoring them and going on the internet
bad people shouldnt be allowed to have clear skin or good hair or nice jaw lines or green eyes
Whoa. The MLA has officially devised a standard format to cite tweets in an academic paper. Sign of the times.
ebooks, Horse. (horse_ebooks). “Leg Butt” 18 Nov 2011, 12:38 PM. Tweet.
i want a relationship but i want them to be like a friend to me, i dont want the relationship to be all about kissing, making out and sex i just wanna hang out with them, and go places, and just have fun wherever we go
This post is surreal because that is exactly how a healthy relationship should be yet we’re convinced this is a weird and unusual thing to ask of our partners.
ISTJ: Practical and down-to-earth. Probably your mother.
ISFJ: Always nice enough to be suspicious and more loyal than all your pets combined.
ISTP: Probably don’t care about you, might still kill you in your sleep though.
ISFP: Always carrying at least 4 daisy chains on them at all times; don’t take them to museums if you ever want to come out again.
INTP: That one guy hiding in their room trying to calculate exactly how much bigger the TARDIS is on the inside.
INFP: Starry-eyed idealist, so caring and sweet they might just rot your teeth out.
INTJ: 50% standoffishness, 50% being right all the time, 100% better than you.
INFJ: Spends half their time delivering melodramatic heroic monologues and the other half attempting to purify the ground they walk on.
ESTJ: 100% committed to their life partner, the rulebook.
ESFJ: Happy to make you happy to make them—could potentially create a feeling paradox.
ESTP: Probably Kanye West.
ESFP: The golden retriever you always wanted, except in human form.
ENTP: Would probably blow up the world to calculate shrapnel velocity.
ENFP: Like a bottle of fizzy soda, except with more righteousness.
ENTJ: Like an INTJ, just better at hiding the fact that they’re an asshole.
ENFJ: The world’s mother hen. May also be running ten cults of worship behind your back.
Why say “ding dong you are wrong” when you could say “eggs and bacon you’re mistaken”
i dont think i’ve ever been so frustrated
Orange you glad it’s not a bananait happened
"can i come in?"
"i don’t know, can you?”
cursing quietly, the vampire backed away, foiled yet again by the english teacher’s pedantry